Leave the Comfort Zone!
Dare to dream? The question may seem simplistic, even silly. But repeat it once more in your mind: do you dare to dream?
Do you allow yourself to imagine what would bring you joy, what would fulfill you?
When Routine Takes Over Life's Momentum
Life in the Western world is a well-oiled machine: everything runs smoothly.
Everything must always >, and without questioning oneself or those around us, we continue to progress along this predetermined path. Whose path is it, and for what purpose?
We evolve, fighting to be the best at achieving this >: school, studies, work, car, marriage, house, baby(s)... With very little room for variations.
We chase these socially desirable goals, not to say socially imposed. We are perpetually busy, always busy running: > We waste our time trying to gain it.
Me, me, ME
Have you ever asked yourself: is this really what I want?
Without considering obligations, without considering attachments and loved ones. Just >.
Do I really want this job, which demands more than 40 hours a week, to the detriment of my social and family life? Do I really want to have children, or is it just a social presupposition that I have adopted, reflecting on how many children I wanted before knowing if I desired to have any?
Let's not skip steps and return to the basics, to the foundations of our lives, before directing it in ways that will allow us to thrive and truly live.
The Comfort Zone
We hear more and more about this famous >, but what exactly is it? This zone represents for each person their space of safety, habits, and routines: the known world. Being in the known world is very comforting.
The trap of this comfort zone is to fall asleep, like a cat purring by the fire, and never question our way of living. The > are robots, with smiling masks: >.
What Drives Us to Leave Our Comfort Zone?
The taste: the taste of a passion, the taste of risk, the taste of a dream.
Daring to dream means projecting ourselves out of our comfort zone, and dipping our first toe into the new world.
Just like entering a pool, there are two schools for entering this new world.
- The more cautious will take the temperature, dip their hand in before finally entering through the stairs. Little by little, they expand the circle defining their comfort zone. Slowly but surely, they push their limits until they dare to exceed them.
- The others, the more daring ones, will make a direct plunge, not caring about the thermal shock.
There is no one school that prevails over the other. What matters is that the approach fits you.
A New World
Once in the pool, once the boundaries of the comfort zone have been crossed: it's the unknown, the void! Everything is to be discovered, everything is to be created. Without a doubt, this may at times be uncomfortable, insecure, and tiring.
But if Christopher Columbus had stayed in his comfort zone, he would never have discovered the New World!
It is in this new world that you will learn what matters to you: a foreign language, motorcycling, diving... It is in this new world that you will be creative and inventive. And it's also where you will venture toward the unknown.
- Lost Innocence At the beginning of life, everything is to be discovered: the child is in constant contact with their >. Of course, they probably need comfort after a long day of adventures, and find satisfaction in their comfort zone, all warm under their blanket with their stuffed animal. But throughout the day, the child dreams, explores, tests, and learns. Have we lost this ease of stepping out of our comfort zone and venturing into the unknown as we grew up?
- The Potential for Self-Confidence To venture into the unknown, the magic recipe is a good dose of self-confidence. Where does it come from? What happens if we lack it? How can we gain (more of) it? You need self-confidence from your first explorations. It builds from a young age, based on your experiences, and also depending on your environment. I will develop this point in another article, as it's a concept worth giving time to.
- Fear Fear is one of the basic feelings (along with joy and anger) and plays a role in our survival, according to evolutionary theory. In the face of a threatening event, fear drives us to choose between one of these two paths: fight or flight. Being afraid and avoiding what causes this feeling is nothing unusual, and fleeing is sometimes preferable. But overcoming fear allows you to broaden your horizons and expand your comfort zone. An overwhelming fear leads to burrowing into one's comfort zone, only occasionally venturing out, without being aware of one's confinement. Why are we afraid and how do we react to this feeling? To learn more about fear, I invite you to read the article Not Even Afraid?. The good news of the day: the comfort zone doesn't only have an in/out mode: you are not simply in your comfort zone or in the Great Unknown: there is an intermediate zone that is often forgotten, the learning zone. I will tell you more in the article Comfort Zone: What We Often Forget!.
- The > The problem with this new world is that one can enjoy it! The return to a routine, dull life will then feel like a gray prison. The lack of novelty and adventure will be experienced as a lack of oxygen. The search for adrenaline will become a central concern and a goal in itself, sometimes at the expense of common sense (take the test: are you an adventurer?).
To Go Further
I recommend watching the video Do you dare to dream?, it's quite nice: it will tell you more about the comfort zone, conformism, and especially the momentum of discovery and creativity needed to realize your dreams.
And You, What Does Your Comfort Zone Look Like?
How would you describe your comfort zone: what is its size? Does it seem cozy and reassuring? Is it the only place where you feel good, confident? Or does it, on the contrary, seem a bit too small to fulfill your aspirations?
Do you go into the new world? Often? For what purpose, on what occasions? What feelings does it provoke?
Take the time to reflect on the last time you felt alive, when your heart raced, when you felt good. What were you thinking or doing? You will surely find a clue here toward your new world. And who knows, you might discover your Eldorado there!
By daring to dream, you open up your possibilities, like a tree that expands, each branch being a path. The more you dream, the more you will be connected to what matters to you. Gradually, your dreams will take on a more concrete form. Until you have no more dreams, just projects.
To Go Further Do you know the principle of a Bucket List? It's a list of things one wishes to accomplish/see/live before dying. A list of promises we make to ourselves, a way not to miss out on life.
- see mine
- And to learn more, I invite you to sign up for the Newsletter: you will receive a free test to help you build your own Bucket List!
Also read in the section Travel & Psychology:
- Comfort Zone: What We Often Forget!
- Self-Confidence
- Not Even Afraid
- First Trip: The Fear of Launching (Response to a Reader)
- How to Make Choices in the Face of the Unknown?